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Live To The Point Of Tears

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Gosh, what a month, what a month.
The above picture is from my FAVORITE comic/graphic quote-book-thing, ‘A Softer World’
Always cheeky, poignant, and reassuring…they used to be in The Coast, which is a free newspaper in Halifax, NS, and I used to cut them out every week. I still have them all tucked away in a box at my moms somewhere.
I found out later you could buy a full-color book version at Strange Adventures comic shoppe, but I found the process of cutting them out and sticking them into an envelope kinda kitsch and wonderful, so.
Yep.

Anywhoo, I guess I have a lot to update you on, so here we go.
I wrote down stuff as it happened to better remember, but it’ll be a bit spotty, my memory has never been great.

On God-knows-what day in Jan, Damon had been drunk for weeks, and I decided enough was enough for me.
I took a Jeepney downtown to Lee Plaza, got a bit of cash out, picked up smokes, and went to Coco Amigos.

I sat there chain smoking and crying, had every intention of sleeping outside, but it was raining and I had forgotten my umbrella. I was half-hoping Damon would show up and take me home but he didn’t. After a while, I was really tired and I just wanted to go home, so I got the last Jeepney back to Valencia and walked back to the house, and slept on the porch.

On the seventh of February, I again packed up and got ray to drive me to Coco’s. I had no money this time, and so I went over to the boardwalk across the street and sat there, smoking.
After a while, I curled up and tried to rest, but kids kept bothering me asking for money and stuff….that’s kinda an annoying part of downtown…..all the kids beg, and I’ve been told that the women sometimes lend their kids out to other homeless/beggar-people so they can have a better haul for the day…..people pity people with kids all around the world, I guess….and they cash in on that fact here.

Anyways, A man and a heavily makeupped Lady stopped eventually and started asking all kinds of questions…I told them my story, told them my visa had been expired since January, etc, and they told me I should go to the Mayor for help in the morning.
After they left, two guys stopped and asked to take my picture.
I was immediately creeped out, wondering why they wanted MY picture, and one guy said he was from Manila for the weekend and so he wanted a picture….My antennas were wiggling furiously, but let them take one..

After they left, the group of kids that had been hanging around told me to call the police because I was going to get taken.
I asked them if they meant kidnapped, and they said yes……so I didn’t know if they knew much English, and I don’t know if that’s what they really meant, but I went to Coco Amigos, and got them to call the police.

They eventually got there, and I told them I was pretty much homeless and my visa was expired….everyone was super nice, and they let me smoke….They took me to the copshop, let me use the computer, gave me hot chocolate….I answered questions and gave all my info and stuff….and then we basically just talked about our two countries, Canada and the Philippines, talked about jobs, food, education, etc until I got tired.

I slept in a bench in a back office, and the next morning it was kinda super rainy.
The day started a bit hectic, they were trying to figure out what to do with me.

We went to see a social worker in Valencia, who gave me P200 for food, but said there was pretty much nothing she could do for me because I had no money or tickets to get home to Canada, and they had no money either.

We went to the Immigration office, and they said I had to update my visa and obtain an exit clearance just to leave, and that they couldn’t help either. I asked about deportation, but since I hadn’t done anything wrong, they said it’d be impossible, and that it takes months anyway.

One of the Female officers bought me lunch at a little cafe and we had a bit of a chat, she told me she’s dating a female judge in Ontario, she showed me pictures, and talked about Canadian money, I pointed out that the toonie and the ten peso looks similar to each other and stuff, it was a really nice break from the stress of the past few days.

After a few hours of head scratching, I was taken to la Casa Esperanza, which is a crisis center for women and children in Dumaguete city. I was told I would be able to stay until Monday, this day being Saturday.

I was shown around, read the rules, and shown to my room, which I shared with a woman and her baby, and a little girl.
It wasn’t really all that different from being at Adsum House, which is a shelter for women in Halifax that I have lived at quite a few times in the past.

My stay was fine, all the girls tried to teach me Tagalog, and I managed to remember a few….I now know shark, water, plate, dog, cat, eyes, and bat…and I have a list of other stuff that I’ve yet to memorize.
I had to beg for coffee and to be able to smoke cigarettes outside out of sight, which had me a bit stressed out for a few days, but I got through it.

On Monday, I heard nothing, then on Wednesday I got really homesick, so I asked them if I could go back to the house and see if things were any better, to try to make peace and stuff.
Two officers and a counselor took me back to the house, and right away I could tell Damon hadn’t even stopped drinking at all.
I spent two days at the house before I figured everything was royally effed, and so I went to the Valencia police station, and told them I wanted to contact the Canadian Embassy about going home.

They cleaned up a little nippa hut on the property and told me I could sleep in it while we got everything straightened out.

It was awesome watching how fast they cleaned and fixed the hut, it was a wreck before I got there, and a team of about six or seven guys zipped around and put a tarp on the roof and all that.
So I lived there for about a week and a half, then Damon sent me a stupid message on Facebook saying my Lush package had arrived….I paid a lot of money for it and so I went back to the house to get it.

Stupid fucking idea.
Damon was sitting in my pajama pants, all contrite and resolved and told me he had stopped drinking and he didn’t want to drink anymore and it was too inconvenient and blah blah blah blah blah, long story short, I decided to give him yet another goddamned chance, and he lasted a week.
As SOON as his mother left for her job, he picked up a bottle and started in on me yet again.

I’m now back living in the hut at the police station, trying to get the Canadian embassy to help me, and being very hungry and frustrated and tired and depressed and suicidal and pretty much the lowest I can currently be.

Donations would sincerely be appreciated at this point.

The Bloody End for now.

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Posted by on March 7, 2014 in Uncategorized

 

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Magically Appearing Title is Magic…Whoops

This is Hay Goat

Well, I was going to give myself a two-day break from writing, but I decided to only make it one day.
I don’t have anything better to do, really, so why not write?

My longed-for rain finally arrived today and spent the whole day hanging out…Ha
Damon and I were going to go to the supermarket to pick up a few things, but as soon as we were about to hop on Scoopy, the sky opened up, so I spent the day just surfing the internet, drinking coffee, and sitting on the porch watching the cats play.

Down the lane a little bit there are two goats that I adore, and every once in a while I go to say hello and smuck them in the heads… Nothing to hurt them, it’s a game for both of us and they love it, every time I walk up to them and say ‘Haaay Goooat’, their tails start wiggling and they put their heads down to smuck my hand.
One I’ve called ‘Hay Goat’ and the other is ‘Butt Goat’ because that one prefers its butt being scratched instead of its head.

I hope someday I can own goats, it’d be fun to run around and play with them… Goats here are usually tied on small ropes and they can’t really wander very far at all…and goat’s milk and cheese is SO GOOD, it would be fun to learn how to make it.
I also want chickens, so we can have fresh eggs… But I guess that would mean putting up with a rooster, they get pretty noisy, but I’m getting very used to them, I think the people down the lane have about ten of them, and every morning they go craaazyyy warbling and ‘AgghhhhUAAAGH-AH-AH-AAAAH’-ing.

Speaking of birds, that is one thing I definitely miss about Canada… The Crows.
I miss crows and their caws…Big, majestic, black-feathered gatekeepers of the Spirit-Side.

That is another reason, as well, that I want to go to Siquijor, I heard its the magickal hot-spot here in the Philippines, and I would absolutely love to sit down and chat with some of the local spirit-working types, I think their stories would be fascinating, even if no one believes in any of the stuff anymore.
I guess since the Spanish and American immigrants came here, most of the Philippine people have been converted into practicing Christianity now.

Which isn’t a terrible thing, it’s a nice religion to follow for the most part, on the surface, most religions are…I suppose as long as you’re practicing what you preach, and are a good human being, you can’t really go wrong.
I’m not very religious personally, I’ve studied pretty much all of them and I can find good in them all, so I’ve always just considered myself more of a Spiritual person… I have a close personal relationship to God, and I often pray. Back in Canada, I’d go to church any time the spirit moved me, and it was never the same church twice. I’ve got to meet a lot of really nice people that way, and while I was hitch hiking cross-country, I found churches to be really awesome places for refuge and recharging my batteries.

I’d like to find a nice church to attend here, there are so many! But I haven’t got the courage yet to go.

 
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Posted by on October 1, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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‘Someday’ Is Not a Day of The Week

Wow, so finally I can update my bloggity for you lovely followers!!!

Google chrome, which I currently am using for my browser decided to arbitrarily update itself, with or without my opinion or choice in the matter. Because of that, my internet was slow as all-get-out for three days, and WordPress wouldn’t load.

Yaaaaay, technology!
Never matter, I’m back, though I can’t say there’s much news.
Damon and I took a ride into town the other day, just to pick up some stuff at Robinson’s Mall, but I really liked and appreciated getting out of the house.
It has been super-tense lately because Donna ((Damon’s Mother)) is pushing and pushing about jobs.
((Ironically, the Department of Immigration posted today on Facebook that companies that hire foreigners that don’t have proper paperwork can be fined up to ten-thousand pesos, and the foreigner in question will be deported.))
So point being, having a break from being hounded was blissful, and I really missed being on the back of the bike with him driving… He may be an insane driver, but I feel comfy and safe when I ride with him, and it reminds me of the first few days I was here.

I tried my hand at the Marinara again today… It was a bit more improved, but still nowhere near his. 

Oh! And my corset arrived, though still no word from my Lush package… The corset is beautiful in real life, and very well made… It fits me, but the way it fits reminds me I’m not a young spring chicken anymore, and should be toning up more often than I do… I’m finding my tummy is getting a bit ‘fluffy’… Ha

There was a big tropical storm in the last few days, it hit Manila pretty bad and there’s been widespread flooding, but it missed us completely except for a spot of rain and maybe three gusts of wind.

Anywhoo, that’s been all for now… I leave you with a short video of Splatter the cat out hunting at night!

The Kitty

 
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Posted by on September 26, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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It Was The Myth of a Rainy Night

Well… More than a myth, it’s been a very rainy day and evening here.

I bounced back and forth between two titles today for the bloggity….this one, and a quote by Jack Johnson that says “Can’t you see that it’s just raining? There ain’t no need to go outside.” Because exactly the opposite was true… I had to go update my visa today at immigration, so I definitely needed to go outside. Either way, I decided to go with Kerouac, just because I like his writing, and I have no idea who Mr. Johnson is, beyond being some singer-dude.

On top of it, Damon is deathly sick, and can barely even hold water down, so it’s been a glorious morning, full of the sounds of pitter-patter rain on a tin roof, and violent bursts from Mr. Chucky McVomit from the other room, the poor thing.

Once Raymond, our helper/housekeeper/family friend arrived at the house, I asked him to drive me into town to the Immigration office and got all my paperwork completed for another two months.
I talked about driving being scary here in my last post, but rain-driving is even worse… I have zero idea how Raymond kept us alive today… I had an umbrella on us while we drove, but he said it got in his way and didn’t help at all, so I put it away… Once I did, I couldn’t even keep my eyes open, let alone on the road, so I’m pretty darn impressed we didn’t die.

I do love the rain here though.
One moment it can be calm and sunny, and the next, there becomes a downpour so heavy that you can’t even see the houses across the way.
There are static lightning storms practically every night, which is awesome to watch, but not very much thunder, which kinda sucks for me, I am absolutely in love with big, loud thunder crackling and booming… the kind that shakes your house when it erupts.

I got home safe and sound, Ray went home early because he was soaked to the bone, and I tried my hand at making a homemade ragu/marinara from scratch…it turned out okay, but still no comparison to Damon’s sauces.
It was very spicy from the Bird’s Eye chilies I threw in, only three tiny red chilies in a whole pan-full of sauce, but my mouth was on fire… we have a giant bush of them in the back yard, too many to ever use up, it is our best-growing plant in the garden, and they are mighty tasty little things… really darn good in burgers as well.

Now I’m curling up with a coffee and some writing, listening to the crickets and the rain, and occasionally going to check on Husby, and generally just relaxing.
Really not an exciting day at all, but then again, not every day can be a darn party!

The following video is the drive from our house into the mall in town…it wasn’t taken today, but a few weeks ago with Damon. Beware, turn your speakers down, as there is a lot of wind noise on the video, and maybe one or two swear words as well.

 
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Posted by on September 19, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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